I love my friends/family but….

Hi there everyone. Going thru anxiety and people close to you trying to understand is very complicated. They mean well but they really dont get it. And going thru it and trying to explain it is very difficult well for me it is.

When I finally started to open up about my anxiety and how bad it is I had a whole different idea of how it would go. I thought my closest friends and family would so understand and have the best advice etc.. But I was wrong. As good as their intentions were it just went the other way.

As good as I explained it and seemed they may have had an idea on whats going on with me they didnt. Some would try and say you just have to get out there and make yourself do things, you have to just get over it, talk yourself outta of it, have a few drinks you will be fine. My favorite is when I have explained myself over and over again the people that would listen and really say they understand would be the first to get mad once you cancel plans. Which in normal circumstances I would totally understand, but it wasnt like I was planning on doing that. The overwhelming thoughts right before I suppose to be somewhere would destroy any kind of fun or happy thoughts that I would have. It was crippling to me. And there was absolutely nothing I mean nothing that could talk me down once I was at that point. It was awful. I have let so many people down and not shown over the years because of this I cant even begin to count.

I know sometimes it is good to talk to people about it. But alot of people naturally just want to fix it not understand it really. I am not faulting anyone in my life for that. My point in this blog today is just to not put so much on someone else when you are trying to explain something like this. I always thought talking to them would at the end of the day help me but it didnt. I ended up thinking worse when I disappointed them or if they gave me some advice they think should work and u try it and it doesnt work. SO my point is be in tune with yourself before you talk to anyone about it. You yourself have got to understand in a way whats going on with you more than anyone, dont ever feel obligated to have to explain to anyone whats going on. I understand this might not be for everyone people need someone to talk to I get that. And I am sure there are people out there very different from the people I experienced. What helps one person is not always the same for the next person. I recently ordered a few books that were like journals for me and motivational quotes for each day of the week. I know that sounds corny and maybe stupid but making myself write in this journal and really practice the different things they asked me to do in this book each day really helped me. It took the pressure off of me with the thoughts of disappointing someone or feel like I am being judged. Kept me thinking about me and improving myself on a daily basis.

You will do great things despite your anxiety.

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